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Alternatives to Giving Fruitcake




Source of Recipe


e-cookbooks
9. It's now PC to call it an "Alternative-Lifestyle" Cake.

8. Thanks to the divorce, instead of giving a fruitcake to my mother-in-law this year, I can be more honest and give her a good swift kick to the head.

7. Tell her what you really think. Car bombs say it with flare.

6. This year's rage -- Chia fruitcake. (Looks suspiciously like last year's fruitcake.)

5. Find that close-out sale on boat anchors and go wild.

4. Although my "poultrycake" was universally panned, Grampa did admit that he hasn't been this regular in years.

3. Now, instead of saying "nutty as a fruitcake," my friends can say "gassy as a beancake!"

2. Aardvark, abacus... zucchini, zwieback.

... and the #1 Alternative to Giving Fruitcake This Year ...

1. Donate all fruitcakes to Habitat for Humanity for use in building safe, sturdy, low-cost housing.